Wandering Knife
Jack Snyder
To red-dead spilling of
now broken asphalt some poor worker will have to
erase the tragedy of this spot. I will erase the blood of
that deer we hit one winter’s evening, that deer that
tossed his body into the car and promptly mangled himself
against two tons of steel. I don’t care for how he
stared at us, still after the clean-up like
when that coyote attacked you, ripped your flesh
from bone. Just as unconcerned as testing a knife’s
edge with seat belt nylon. How hard you really have to cut
to clear those two inches of black denial, to save someone’s
soul. And I can’t help
remembering how
when their life was already gone, and we were soaked
in the juices of animal-existence. Oh, how could we have
ended his life! We could not save him, so I ended his life
with my cool blade, that horrible blood-wand. And I watch the
rotor-blades spinning toward the heavens, sucking up
the lost souls into another mechanical brutality: the
cars, now airborne. Forever crashing into everything,
everywhere, at all times. This forever-grief, this forever-blood.
All my forever-thoughts,
dashed against a darkness bearing rock. To a screech
so inhuman it can only come from a wounded animal,
is what I think, this deer is only wounded. He will be fine.
As we push him from the side of the road to branch-laden
forest floor to
steady my hand through clawing fingers, slick with blood and grime and tears,
like you steadied yourself after the blood loss. I can only imagine
the pain and the suffering.
Jack Snyder (he/they) is a process–based philosopher, poet, artist, and cryptid from the Southern California wilderness. His work interrogates contentment, identity, love, belief, authenticity, faith, normativity, and other philosophical themes in a natural setting. When not outdoors, he appreciates music, food, and drink in relation. Thus Jack’s quandary and thirst drive him challenging places. He hopes he will drive you there also.
Issue 16
2023